Thursday Two Questions #42-The Good and The Bad of Sharing
Certain people I know sharing the same email address, and later get into argument if the subject is sensitive, or on family matters. For those couples who chose this route, you have my admiration if you are still getting along without resentments; but for those couples who are bickering at everything the spouse got in the email, I feel for you!
I believe in having privacy for each person, and it is a matter of trust, which we could argue at both ends of the spectrum. On one side, you should trust your partner enough to give him/her the needed space to be an individual; but on the other end of the argument, you have to trust each other totally to just have one email address.
Sharing is fine and dandy, but when sharing became a nightmare, it is best to establish boundary! Thus, my two questions for this week are below:
1) Why did you decide to have just one email account for both of you when it is free and easy to have two? If you don’t share the same email, what is your thought on this subject?
2) Privacy matters! Does this have to do with trust in a relationship or is it a control overhead?
Join others at Thursday Two Questions!
I believe in having privacy for each person, and it is a matter of trust, which we could argue at both ends of the spectrum. On one side, you should trust your partner enough to give him/her the needed space to be an individual; but on the other end of the argument, you have to trust each other totally to just have one email address.
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| Allium flower |
1) Why did you decide to have just one email account for both of you when it is free and easy to have two? If you don’t share the same email, what is your thought on this subject?
2) Privacy matters! Does this have to do with trust in a relationship or is it a control overhead?
Join others at Thursday Two Questions!
11 comments:
this is an interesting topic, because I do agree with you, I think each person should have his own account. Then again, I know people who check each other's emails (or share a Facebook Id)! Don't know how this works out but there is this privacy issue. Makes me wonder who is reading my email! They must be really close.
I believe in trust and privacy. Our cell phones are private. Why not our email? I believe when she cheat someone we first cheat ourselves.
oh, i believe couple should still have some moments of privacy and "me" time and "me" place, just like trees or plants, put them close to each other they have hardly space, they hardly grow or become stunted, for me, we all need space. this also allows both of us to talk so many things because most of the time i feel sharing what i wanted to share what someone told me, this or that.
Great questions. I know people who share each others emails and it does cause problems.
I think couples should have their own private email accounts and if they want to share one together as well that would be a good solution.
I think each person should have their own e-mail account.
And I don't think it's right to open a letter that's not addressed to you - even if it's your partner's.
We each have separate e-mails, simply because we did before we were married. Also, we would have gotten them separately, because it allows those who send you an e-mail to be completely open and not feel like they have to refrain from being comfortable(if they know one of you better than the other). We do share facebook, though, since the wall is public anyway.
I think it is a personal security thing. Also, some people feel more connected with their spouse if they have a joint e-mail. I say, whatever floats your boat, as long as it doesn't bump into mine. ;)
as far as i know, i don't have [married] friends who share an email address. i believe that privacy if a good thing. i am not married but i think it's healthy to keep some things to yourself.
a partner who insists on sharing an email address or reading text messages on the other partner's cel phone has either trust or control issues.
So funny! This is a great subject. I can't see L and I ever be this intimate. LOL. Too close for comfort. Even though we can look in each others accounts, we never have time to. We don't have time to share the same email, since it would mean reading the others emails too.
I think it would be deadly for him to lose his individuality...me too. I would just go and create another one for MYSELF. Family email? Humm...I don't know of anything that would require one email address per family, and you know what? No one would check it since we would end up counting on the other person to check...you know what I mean?
My ex- GF has the same personal email with her hubby. So intruding...to me. I refrained from sending her emails about our get together, because I feel like I am not speaking to her but to him too. It was not welcome in my book. :-)
This was a huge question, and I have another essay for the second :-) But for time sake, I say neither for us, it is about time.
For the one example I gave earlier I would guess that "they think" it is cute, and it shows their total commitment to each other.
Interesting question. I guess there are couples who share but I don't know any.
My hubs and I don't share computers and it never occurred to us to share email accounts. We totally trust each other and have no reason to read each others email but we do know where each other's password lists are kept.
1. After we got married we did get an email for both of us. It's so people could send us stuff in one place that we both would see at the same time. Turns out that was a big fail. We rarely ever go to the email.
We still maintain our separate accounts. he doesn't seem to want to know what's going on in mine and I trust him with his, however there have been times when he has made me distrust him terribly and I deisre to see his email but have not asked.
Plus even if I demand a password to his email, he can delay and quickly transfer things out and make a new email addy hidden from me right? so what's the point?
2. Privacy is apart of trust and also good for each individual. Privacy in certain things become a big issue when trust is broken and the need for openness is needed.
Aloha!
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